Longing for More

I’m dreaming of a White Christmas. I’ll be Home for Christmas. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas. The best Christmas songs are all about longing. Longing for snow, for home, for togetherness and for magic.

Christmas makes us feel like something magical can happen. Like if we just attended the perfect Christmas party or caught the right train, then we would meet the person of our dreams and find the funding for that cute little pie shop we long to open. Not to mention the fact that movies like Love Actually and White Christmas show us that a delightfully choreographed song and dance number is all that’s needed to fix our relationship problems (I’ve prepared something for the occasion, just in case that turns out to be true).

I long for the magic of Christmas in my life.

I haven’t always wanted to reveal my areas of longing to others. I am a private person (as evidenced by the fact that I wrote a blog for a year without sharing it with friends and family). Also, I don’t want to appear discontented with my life. I am so grateful for where God has me right now - working at an awesome church with amazing students, part of a supportive family who loves me, and hanging out with the best friends in the world.

More than my privacy issues and not wanting to appear discontented, I also know that sometimes my longing embarrasses me. My practicality seems to fight directly with my longing for dreams that are God-filled and miraculous. It feels foolish to admit that you want something you may never get. And I find myself vulnerable confessing year after year to people and to myself that I hope for things that haven’t yet materialized.

But the reality is I still long. I long for Christ. I feel pangs of loneliness. I ache for my friends and family to experience the life God offers. I cry out for healing for those closest to me. I anticipate and yes, long, to make a greater impact in this world. I am unsatisfied with the selfishness that infiltrates my life and I want to move beyond it. I long for more.

Advent is a time when we are invited to long for more. As we feel our longing for Christ increase during this season, our senses heighten to the reality of His presence in our lives. And as we walk in step with Him, we wake up to our deepest desire…Christ. When we long for Christ and for His best in our lives, we enter into longing that is not discontentment and that flies in the face of keeping our lives private. Our longings in life direct us to God and lead us to live honestly and vulnerably in front of Him and others. Allowing God to guide us in our longing also frees us up to experience His unexpected answers to our desires. We open our eyes to see God move us. And His work in our life answers our longings in the best way possible–by making us into the men and women he longs for us to be.  

Our longing for Christ also puts us right in the middle of the Christmas story. When Christ was born, people were longing for Him too. For Messiah. For salvation. For freedom. They longed for Him to come. And even though the reality may not have been what they expected, He did come. And He is coming again.

At Christmas time, there is magic in the air. As we long for Christ, we live in the magic of longing for the One who can actually make the impossible happen. We long for Him who can free us, heal us, and make us whole. This Christmas, I’m praying that we open ourselves up to God’s leading. That we walk honestly and vulnerably before Him with our longings. I’m also praying boldly this Christmas that God answers the deepest longings of our heart. And that we have eyes to see the unexpected ways He leads us into His best for our life.